Geeko Farm

We’ve had a goodly supply of rhubarb come online, and so I wanted to make a rhubarb crumble. I had a kilo, and like ginger and lemon in it. So I got ChatGPT to come up with a rhubarb recipe, added my extras and preferences, put it in metric units, and got the AI to write the usual cheesy preamble and so forth in the style of Julia Child.

So here’s what it came up with. It tasted really, really good. This serves about 8:

Ginger and Lemon Rhubarb Crumble

This classic dessert features tender, tart rhubarb with a crispy, crunchy topping that sticks to the ribs. Infused with the warm spices of ginger and the bright tang of lemon, this crumble is the perfect balance of sweet and tart. Serve with a generous scoop of creamy custard, velvety ice cream, or a dollop of freshly whipped cream.

Ingredients

• 1 kg rhubarb, chopped
• 225g sugar
• 25g flour
• 2 tsp cinnamon
• 2 tsp ginger, grated
• 2 tsp lemon zest, grated
• Juice of 1 lemon
• ¼ tsp salt
• 250g flour
• 250g oats
• 250g brown sugar
• 125g butter, unsalted, chilled and cut into small pieces

Instructions

Preheat oven to 190°C (375°F). In a mixing bowl, toss together the rhubarb, sugar, flour, cinnamon, ginger, lemon zest, lemon juice, and salt until well combined. Transfer mixture to a 200mm square or equivalent volume baking dish, approximately 50mm deep.

In a food processor, pulse together the flour, oats, and brown sugar. Add the chilled butter and pulse until mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Sprinkle crumble mixture evenly over the rhubarb mixture. Place the dish on a baking sheet and bake in preheated oven for 35-40 minutes or until top is golden brown and rhubarb is tender.

Remove from oven and let cool for a few minutes before serving. Serve with a generous scoop of creamy custard, velvety ice cream, or a dollop of freshly whipped cream.

Bon appétit! Enjoy this delicious twist on a classic dessert, inspired by the flavours of New Zealand, Julia Child, and ChatGPT!

V1.0 vik@olliver.family.gen.nz (C)2023, GFDL Applies

If you want to print it out, here’s a PDF.

This is similar to our previous loaf, but we’ve done away with the lecithin entirely and cut back on the seeds and malt a bit, making for a more even crumb. If you like a denser loaf, skip the malt entirely. With all the seeds, a dense loaf worked well, but we wanted something more like a standard artisanal loaf. You can download the recipe here.

Ingredients

¼ Cup Sunflower kernels
¼ Cup Pumpkin kernels
¼ Cup Linseed (flax seed)
¼ Cup Sesame seeds
1½ tsp Salt
1 tsp Instant yeast, heaped
25g Rye flour
145g Wheat gluten
30g Olive oil or butter
40g Oat fibre
1 tsp Malt (optional)
1 Egg

Directions

Put the 4 seeds in a 1l microwaveable container with 120ml of water, add the salt, stir, and microwave on full for 1½ minutes to make a seedy porridge. That’s roughly 40g of each by weight. Leave it to cool slightly and absorb the liquid. Stir in the malt if you’re using it.

Put the blade in the breadmaker – important – and place the breadmaker tin on scales. Add the heaped spoon of yeast (or use a packet) first so you don’t boil it with the hot porridge. Add the remaining ingredients. Dump 120ml of cold water and warm porridge on top. You might find you need slightly less water depending on the general humidity.

Set breadmaker to make a medium (850g) standard loaf. Leave it to cool and firm up before cutting or the seeds will tear loose. Slice it fairly thin. If it collapses, use less water next time.

This toasts and so forth much like ordinary bread and keeps very well.

V1.2 ©2020 vik@olliver.family.gen.nz GFDL Applies

Vik makes these a lot and they’re darn tasty (video of the experience here). It is very important to use raw, shelled peanuts with intact skins. Without the skin the coating falls off. We do this in an air fryer, but a fan oven and a shallow metal bowl should work fine – or use a hot air gun! (Downloadable/printable PDF here).

Ingredients

250g Raw peanuts
¼ tsp Cooking oil
1 tbsp Chickpea flour
½ tsp Salt
½ tsp Hot paprika or cayenne
½ tsp garlic powder
1 tsp Onion powder
1 tbsp Light soy sauce

Instructions

Toss the peanuts in a large metal or glass bowl with the oil to evenly coat them – this really does not require much oil. You can use spray-on oil, just don’t over-oil them. Pop your oiled nuts in the air fryer or preheated fan oven at 200C for 6 mins to roast them. Jiggle them half-way. Meanwhile, prepare the coating.

Mix the chickpea flour, salt, paprika, garlic powder and onion powder in the empty, oily peanut bowl. Gradually whisk in about a tablespoon of light soy sauce until you have something like slightly runny peanut butter.

By now your peanuts should be hot and glistening. Tip them into the bowl and really quickly mix it all together; I use a fork for this. After a few seconds the heat from the peanuts should create lots of steam. Do not mix much longer or the skins come off. Pop the peanuts back in the air fryer, evenly spread out, for 3 minutes. Shake them loose, and pop back in for another 2-3 minutes (some types of peanut burn quickly, some don’t).

Pour into a metal sieve or colander, shake to break up the larger lumps, spread the nuts out, and leave to cool completely. Yes, you can prop a small desk fan over the sieve to cool them quickly if you are impatient.

Snack away. Will keep in the open for a day or so, otherwise let them stabilize for 4-6 hours then store in a sealed container. No idea how long they last beyond that, the situation has not yet arisen.

V1.0 vik@olliver.family.gen.nz (C)2020, GFDL Applies

This is similar to our very seedy keto rye loaf, and yes, it does actually contain crickets. We’re not sure what it is in crickets that ferments well, but ferment it does allowing this loaf to rise in a rapid breadmaker with no sugar or sweetener.

Ingredients
¼ Cup Sunflower kernels
¼ Cup Pumpkin kernels
¼ Cup Linseed (flax seed)
¼ Cup Sesame seeds
1½ tsp Salt
1 tsp Instant yeast, heaped
25g Rye flour
135g Wheat gluten
30g Olive oil or butter
40g Cricket flour
2 tsp Malt, heaped
½ tsp Lecithin
1 Beaten egg

Directions
Put the 4 seeds in a 2l microwaveable container with 120ml of water, add the salt, stir, and microwave on full for 1½-2 minutes to make a seedy porridge. Leave it to cool slightly .

Put the blade in the breadmaker – important – and place the breadmaker tin on scales. Add the heaped spoon of yeast (or use a packet) first so you don’t boil it with the hot porridge. Add the remaining ingredients. Dump 120ml of tepid water and warm porridge on top. We use the water to rinse out the egg beating equipment, and you might find you need slightly less water depending on the general humidity.

Set breadmaker to make a medium (850g) wholemeal loaf with a dark crust. Leave it to cool and firm up before cutting or the seeds will tear loose. Slice it fairly thin. If it collapses, use less water next time.

This toasts and so forth much like ordinary rye bread and keeps exceptionally well. Anything else just isn’t cricket.

V1.0 ©2020 vik@olliver.family.gen.nz GFDL Applies

After doing analysis on low carb bread recipes, we created a spreadsheet that allowed us to balance protein, fibre, seeds, yeast, and sugar for raising. This loaf is the outcome. It really does taste and behave like real bread, and does not require outrageously difficult ingredients. We’ve put a video of making one here on the youtubes. If you fancy a downloadable PDF it’s here. Or just read on.

Recipe

A very, very seedy loaf, and if you didn’t tell anyone it was low carb they would never guess. While fairly ketogenic, it is not low in calories – upwards of 2,400 kcal or 9,000kJ – and you’ll only want a slice or two a day so this is definitely family-sized. If you have a smaller breadmaker, you can reduce the recipe by 2/3. The malt in it will be partially fermented by the yeast, so won’t contribute too much to carbohydrates. Unless, of course, you lick the spoon…

Ingredients

½ Cup Sunflower kernels

½ Cup Pumpkin kernels

½ Cup Linseed (flax seed)

½ Cup Sesame seeds

1½ tsp Salt

1 tsp Instant yeast, heaped

25g Rye flour

135g Wheat gluten

30g Olive oil or butter

40g Oat fibre

2 tsp Malt, heaped

½ tsp Lecithin

1 Beaten egg

170ml Cold water

Directions

Put the 4 seeds in a 2l microwaveable container with 100ml of water, add the salt, stir, and microwave on full for 1½-2 minutes to make a seedy porridge. That’s 75g of each by weight, but you can halve that if it’s too seedy for you. Leave it to cool slightly and absorb the liquid. You can leave them to soak for 6 hours instead.

Put the blade in the breadmaker – important – and place the breadmaker tin on scales. Add the heaped spoon of yeast (or use a packet) first so you don’t boil it with the hot porridge. Add the remaining ingredients. Dump 170ml of cold water and warm porridge on top. We use the water to rinse out the egg beating equipment, and you might find you need slightly less water depending on the general humidity.

Set breadmaker to make a medium (850g) wholemeal loaf. Leave it to cool and firm up before cutting or the seeds will tear loose. Slice it fairly thin. If it collapses, use less water next time.

This toasts and so forth much like ordinary rye bread and keeps well.

V1.0 ©2020 vik@olliver.family.gen.nz GFDL Applies

This is “Nell Olliver’s Superb Pineapple Cake” as made by our Gran, Eleanor Ruth Olliver, and scoffed wholesale by Vik as she drove him home from school. Some of these details are things he remembers, but the basic recipe was provided by Aunty Mary. If you like a rich cake with a soft crumb that sticks to your ribs, this is the one to make.

Ingredients
170g Soft brown sugar
110g Butter
Sml tin Crushed pineapple
225g Plain flour
2½ tsp Baking powder
½ tsp Salt
2 Eggs
110g Glacé cherries
340g Mixed dried fruit
1 tsp White sugar

Instructions
Put all the contents of the tin of pineapple, the sugar, and butter into a saucepan big enough to stir all the ingredients in and bring to the boil. Cut the heat, dissolve the sugar as best you can, and let it all cool off enough to not scramble the eggs.
Gran would set her oven to Gas Mark 2 to warm up at this point, which these days is 130C for a fan oven, and 140C for an ordinary electric one.
Gran bought self-raising flour, which was invented in 1845 by the British baker Henry Jones for the admiralty as an alternative to broken hard tack biscuits. We buy plain flour in bulk and just add our own baking powder and salt. Either way, put that in the saucepan with the eggs, glacé cherries, and dried fruit. Mix thoroughly.
A loaf tin was the container of choice for Gran, and I recall she lined it with buttered greaseproof paper. Pack the mixture in, and leave the surface a little rough so it goes crunchy. Assist this by sprinkling a little white sugar over the top.
As a loaf shape, this takes about 1¼ hours to cook. Allow it to cool on a rack for as long as you can before scoffing the lot.
It keeps well, in theory anyway.

V1.0 vik@olliver.family.gen.nz (C)2020, GFDL Applies

Printable PDF here.

On our YouTube page we promised you our cauliflower curry recipe in a video.

It’s our favourite way of dealing with cauliflower, and a change from cauliflower cheese. it takes an hour or so to put together and the smell is amazing. You can make it with a whole tin of tomatoes rather than fresh, leave out the water at the end. We generally serve it with a dal and rice.

Ingredients

• 1 Onion, medium
• 4 Garlic cloves, squished, skinned
• 1 Thumb-sized lump fresh ginger
• 1 Cauliflower, nice, big
• ½ tsp Ground turmeric
• 1½ tsp Salt
• 120ml Cooking oil
• 1 Tomato, medium (or a tin)
• 1 Heap of fresh coriander
• ¼ tsp Cayenne or hot paprika
• 2 tsp Ground coriander
• 2 tsp Ground cumin
• ½ tsp Garam masala
• 15ml Lemon juice

Instructions

Roughly chop the onion, garlic and ginger and put them in the blender with the turmeric, salt and enough water to make it all blend smoothly. Blend it smoothly.

Break up the cauliflower into florets roughly 20mmx50mm max. Wash, drain, evict wildlife. Chop up the tomato and fresh coriander, squeeze your lemon, sort out your spices.

Warm the oil in a heavy pan that takes a lid. Fry the paste (explosion warning) for about 5 mins and don’t worry if it sticks. We’re aiming for the oil to separate out a bit.

Put in the tomato, and coriander and boil that down for a few minutes, then add everything else and simmer. If you’re using fresh tomato, put in about 60ml of warm water or it’ll dry out and burn. Stir it all up and cook for 30-45 mins depending on how you like your cauliflower.

Goes great with rice & peas, or flatbread. Keeps well in the fridge, and can be cooked in advance and left on standby.

V1.0 vik@olliver.family.gen.nz (C)2019, GFDL Applies

We’re working up a bit of a tour for our Fab Lab, and we need these pictures on the web for it. So, might as well show the world:

There, that should do it. Now back to your scheduled programming.

As promised on our YouTube site, the recipe for the famous wholegrain cheese straws. PDF at the bottom of the page for those who want to print it.

These are really savoury cheese straws, with a decent crunch. They have a pretence of being vaguely healthy with seeds and grains in them – we use the same mix of oats, kibbled grains, linseed, sunflower seed and so forth as our “Ollenburg loaf” but mix your own to suit or just use oats. Also, a good way of using up excess pastry, and yes we do put seed mix in our pastry for savoury tarts.

Ingredients

½ cup Grain/seed mix

1 tsp Soy sauce

70g Butter, or lard and butter

140g Flour

1 tsp Garlic powder

¼ tsp Cayenne or hot paprika

1 tsp Salt

Some Cold milk

1 cup Grated strong cheese

flour and oil to grease tray

Instructions

Well in advance, put the grains and seeds in a small bowl with ½ cup of water. Leave for 3-4 hours. You can just microwave the grains in some water and wash them under the cold tap if you’re rushed, but they must be cold before they’re added.

Put lumps of cold, hard butter, the flour, garlic powder, cayenne and salt in the food processor. Give it 10 second on/10 second off pulses until there are no lumps of butter. Put in the grains and soy sauce. Turn on low. If it doesn’t start to clump together, dribble in milk until it only just does. Stop processor, bring mix together by hand, wrap and chill for ½ hour.

Set the oven to 180C or 160C fan. Grate cheese. Grease and flour large baking sheet. Flour and roll out pastry to 5mm thick, cover 2/3 with cheese, fold the empty 1/3 over half the cheese, then fold it to cover the rest of the cheese. Fold square. Flatten, fold up again, and flatten into long shape 6mm thick and about 100mm wide. Cut into 8mm “straws” and transfer to the baking sheet.

Bake for approx 15-20 minutes until you see browned cheese and the straws are not moist. The phrase “golden brown and delicious” was invented for these straws.

Cool on a rack. In theory keeps in a biscuit tin for weeks. In practice they evaporate spontaneously.

V1.0 Vik Olliver (C)2019, GFDL Applies